


The Galaxy Games

by EmeraldSeaBug



Category: Wander Over Yonder
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hunger Games, It's got some violence since it's pretty much the Hunger Games, Minor Character Death, Violence, but it's pretty serious, if you've read my stuff before you'll know that it won't be the most serious thing ever, if you've read the hunger games I think you've got a pretty good idea of what's gonna go down, the focus goes to the main characters, the original characters are just to fill in the blanks, they are all villain characters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2018-06-24
Packaged: 2019-01-25 10:05:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12528900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldSeaBug/pseuds/EmeraldSeaBug
Summary: The second season (of their lives) had only just ended, and the Secret Planet's occupants were already facing another massive threat... the Galaxy Games: a giant, traveling arena in which five galaxies' best two villains are forcefully entered into a fight-or-die tournament, where only one will survive, and be crowned the greatest in all the galaxies... and it had finally found its way to the humble little galaxy that had just had all its defenses thoroughly destroyed. The two last contestants had already been chosen, now all that was left to do is bring them in and let the Galaxy Games begin.





	1. In Which Everyone's Expectations are Completely Destroyed

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to make it clear that I give the Hunger Games FULL CREDIT for this concept, it is NOT mine, if anything this is just a fun fan parody. Honestly, one of these had to be made for this fandom, I just love the premise, don't judge me.  
> Let the games BEGIN!!

Perpetually dark rooms hold even darker secrets, some may say. Especially if the room in question was like this one; eerily perfect in every way, with papers neat on a long, expensive oak desk, all writing utensils placed secure and perfectly vertical beside them. The floor was clean, polished oak, and the chair placed by the desk was the most comfortable type money could buy. The room was lit by nothing but a giant computer screen, taking up nearly an entire wall. A single silhouette of a man stood in front of it. Everything was completely silent, but for the sudden ring of a phone. The man reached into his back pocket, and answered the device.  
"Do you have her?"  
His voice was clear and smooth, but vibrated deep within his throat.

The device was silent for but a moment. The recipient of the question knew that hesitation would not be tolerated in this presence.  
"Yes, sir. She is heavily sedated and in a designated resting area. Very feisty, this one."

The man smiled. "Indeed. That is why she has been chosen. Tell the pilots to head to our final destination."

"Yes, sir." A dial tone sounded from the phone, and it was turned off.

The man lowered the phone to his side, and looked at the wall's screen, and at the beautiful forestation it displayed. His eyes were half-lidded with contentment. The games were soon to begin.

...

The end of the battle against Dominator seemed to have started a whole new beginning for everyone else in the Galaxy, even if to Wander, it seemed like something of a personal failure. Dominator was so close to change, he knew it! The only thing keeping him from chasing after her was the great crowd of friends seeming so happy to have him back... and the victory party, of course. All great triumphs can't go uncelebrated, and this party would surely trump them all. After all, everyone in the galaxy was there. How could they not be? They hadn't even began rebuilding the place, yet.  
For the moment, the general mood was light and happy. Everyone stood around the giant clearing and spoke with each other jovially, for the most part, at least. The atmosphere was peaceful. It was all a helpful fellow could ask for.  
Though, even despite the warm feelings all around, it was still pretty hard for the nomad not to feel a bit sad. The galaxy was regrowing, but there were still so many things that would never be the same.  
Wander smiled down at the ground, slight sadness in his eyes. So much had been lost... but there was still so much to gain. If he was sure of anything at all, it was that.

"Hey, buddy."

Wander looked up at Sylvia, who was smiling at him unconcernedly. He smiled back twice as big. "Well hey there, Syl! How's the rebuilding plan going?"

Sylvia sat down beside her friend, and sipped on the extra fruity drink she had in her hand. She shrugged. "It's going how plans usually go, slowly. How're you holding up, pal?"

Wander tugged on his hat's brim a little bit, a nervous tic. "Right as rain! Sorry I haven't helped much with the plan, it's just so easy to get distracted with so many nice folks around!" He pointed to where Beeza and Jeff were having a chat. "Some of these people I haven't seen for ages!" He smiled at some more of the old friends scattered across his view warmly. This party was fantastic, and he felt bad for sitting a bit away from it, lost in his thoughts. "I'd be so happy to help though, if you need it!"

Sylvia tipped his hat a little over his face fondly. "Buddy, you're helping just by being here. Make sure to keep it up, alright?"

Wander laughed. "That should be easy enough to do." 

The two were then joyfully interrupted by one of the friendlier watchdogs, who arrived to tell them that everyone was gathering around the 'secret' hideout to hear the basic outline of the plan. Sylvia and Wander nodded at each other, smiling, and Sylvia grabbed Wander and plopped him in her saddle, then walked towards the hideout.

"Might as well see how the optic nerd handles talking to a crowd that doesn't have to do everything he says," Sylvia smirked. "This'll be great."

Wander wagged a finger. "I'm sure Commander Peepers is going to wow everyone with his social skills- why are you laughing?"

"Nothing, nothing, no reason. He's so good at conversations after all, a real charmer, definitely."

As soon as the made their way to the crowd surrounding the hideout, Wander got a glimpse of exactly how annoyed and stressed out Peepers looked. Having to deal with all this morality must have gotten to him, since he and Hater had reluctantly decided to help rebuild the galaxy (so they could conquer it later, of course). Standing at the front of the crowd was Hater, who looked like he had just rolled out of the wrong side of a bed of nails; that is to say, he looked irritated and extremely uncomfortable with this predicament. As far as Hater was concerned, things couldn't get much worse than this. 

"Alright everyone, LISTEN UP!" barked Peepers. The audience quieted down somewhat.  
"What I have in front of me is the rough draft of a blueprint for a vehicle which will make rebuilding the galaxy much easier than it would be by hand, it doesn't have a name yet, but that isn't-"

"Can we name it Jacob?!" Shouted an unknown voice.

"No- What? No! We're not naming this incredibly serious and complicated machine 'Jacob.' Now, the first thing-"

"How about the build-o-tron 3000?" Shouted another voice. 

"That doesn't make any sense, there's only one of them!" Said the previous voice, which was quickly answered by another, then another, and soon the entire giant audience of people were screaming out different names for the vehicle. It got so maddeningly loud, that Hater was snapped out of his somewhat dark reverie. He jumped in front of everyone and screamed his battle cry, shooting lightning out of his hands and casting the area in neon green lighting. 

"ALL OF YOUR NAMES ARE STUPID AND YOU'RE STUPID! BE QUIET!"

Commander Peepers cleared his throat. "Thank you, sir. Now-"

"We should name it Lesley!" Wander shouted from a distance away.  
"Yeah, it looks like a Lesley!" Sylvia joined in.

Hater glared around at the crowd, trying to spot the two.  
Peepers was beginning to develop a severe migraine. He stomped a foot. "ENOUGH WITH THE NAMES! IF ANYONE ELSE SHOUTS A NAME, IT'LL BE THE ONE WRITTEN ON YOUR GRAVESTONE!"

There was silence. Peepers regained his composure incredibly quickly. "Thank you. Anyway, this ship will only be big enough to fit a maximum of four people, considering that the rest of its storage will be used to carry materials for rebuilding. Only four people are required to pilot it, thankfully." He held up a hand to stop Hater before he could say anything. "NO, it is not like the robomechabotatron. This is different, since it has emergency autopilot, and isn't a pile of over-glorified junk. Any questions?"

At least 50 people immediately raised their hand, and Peepers rolled his eye before calling on a Bingleborp in the front of the group. "Yes?"

"Will there be a bathroom on the ship?"  
Everyone who had their hand up immediately put it back down.

"... Yes, there will be. Any other questions? Maybe ones that aren't terrible?"

Wander raised his hand.

"... Anyone? Anyone at all?" Peepers looked around the audience desperately, and Wander raised both his hands and began jumping up and down.  
"Please...?" He sighed. "Okay Wander, what's your question?"

"Is there any chance of someone getting hurt on the mission, Mr. Peepers? Will it have all necessary safety precautions? Does it have seatbelts? Life vests? Some of those little air masks that pop down when you're about to crash?"

"Okay, one, that's more than just a single question, and two, most of those things would just waste resources. This ship has NO possible chance of crashing, got it? It will be a peaceful, meticulous ship, floating through space on its stupid little mission to help the galaxy. Nobody is even going to be there to crash into it, so it's completely safe. Now, any USEFUL questions?"

Nobody raised their hand. Someone in the back coughed uncomfortably.

"... Good. We'll need everyone who is able to gather resources to come up and take a list of them, and everything from then on will be smooth sailing for the Watchdogs in charge of ship-building. Dismissed." 

A Watchdog with a giant stack of lists walked precariously out in front of Peepers, ready to hand them out as everyone who was willing to help began walking forward. Just as soon as the first person grabbed a paper, everything became mysteriously dark.

There was silence, as it seemed as if night had just suddenly and inexplicably descended upon the planet. For just about everyone there, this feeling was all too familiar. With fear in their eyes, the planet's inhabitants looked up.

Above them, a ginormous ship enveloped the entire sky. The ship had to be three times as large as Dominator's ship was, and three times as imposing. All they could see was its giant, dark blue underside, and two ginormous letter G's. Nobody dared to speak, until Hater's enraged shout was heard by everyone in the clearing. 

"GROP IS THIS SERIOUSLY HAPPENING AGAIN?!"

Nobody challenged his statement, as they were all thinking the exact same thing. The rumbling from the ship's movement suddenly ceased as it paused in midair, and a number of distant clanks were heard before a gigantic screen began slowly descending to come to a rest in front of the planet, in full view of everyone watching it. After about ten seconds, the screen flickered on to show the same two-lettered logo that was on the underside of the ship, and with it came a booming voice from the giant speakers attached to the screen. 

"WELCOME, ONE AND ALL, TO THE 50TH ANNUAL GALAXY GAMES!"

The clearing was flooded with confused murmuring. Sylvia leaned down to Wander and whispered: "Do you know what that is?"

Wander, his expression positively baffled, shook his head slowly as the loud voice continued speaking. 

"YOUR HUMBLE GALAXY AND EXACTLY FOUR OTHERS HAVE BEEN SPECIFICALLY CHOSEN TO PARTICIPATE THIS YEAR, OUT OF COUNTLESS OTHER POSSIBLE CONTESTING GALAXIES! CONGRATULATIONS!" Canned applause rang out from the speakers. Emperor Awesome muttered to whoever was next to him: "Those things could play some sick beats, I bet." The person standing next to him took one step in the other direction.

"FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE, THE RULES AND HISTORY OF THE GAMES WILL BE TOLD TO YOU RIGHT NOW, SO LISTEN UP!"  
The screen suddenly changed to display photos of battling alien ships and planets.  
"MANY YEARS AGO, GALAXY AFTER GALAXY WAGED WAR AGAINST EACH OTHER IN AN ENDLESS MASSACRE, EACH GALAXY LOOKING TO BE THE GREATEST IN THE UNIVERSE! BUT AS MORE PEOPLE DIED, SOME BEGAN TO BECOME MORE INDEPENDENT, AND THEY OVERTHREW THEIR TYRANNICAL PREDECESSORS.”  
Pictures of rioting aliens flashed onto the screen, holding torches that lit up their rebellious expressions.  
“UNFORTUNATELY, MANY PEOPLE WERE STILL UNHAPPY WITH THEY WAY THINGS HAD BECOME, AND WITHIN THEIR OWN GALAXIES, INDEPENDENT MONARCHIES BEGAN SPRINGING UP EVERYWHERE, ON ALL KINDS OF DIFFERENT PLANETS.”  
Pictures of proud kings now began filling up the screen, flicking by and showing the diverse array of species and monarchies.  
“WITH THESE MONARCHIES, SINGLE PEOPLE WITH ARMIES OF SUPPORTERS BEGAN TRYING TO CONQUER EVERYONE ELSE, AND THE COMPETITION BEGAN TO BE FOCUSED ONLY IN EACH INDIVIDUAL GALAXY. GALACTIC LEADER-BOARDS BECAME A COMMON PHENOMENON, AND NOW THERE IS ONE IN JUST ABOUT EVERY GALAXY OUT THERE! EVENTUALLY, A MAN REFERRED TO ONLY AS MR. GRAND HAD THE BRILLIANT IDEA TO START A COMPETITION, A GRAND COMPETITION, IN WHICH TWO OF THE GREATEST VILLAINS FROM FIVE DIFFERENT GALAXIES COULD COMPETE TO BECOME THE VERY GREATEST IN THAT ENTIRE QUADRANT! AND SO, THE GALAXY GAMES WERE BORN."  
A photo of an unassuming alien man was pictured, smiling gently and waving from behind a podium. His skin was pure white and his eyes were deep and black. He wore a tuxedo, and overall, looked incredibly unthreatening.

Everyone stared at the board in silence, taking everything in. Wander frowned. Most of that history was correct, but there still seemed to be a lot of holes in Mr. Grand's logic...

"THE RULES FOR THE GAMES ARE SIMPLE: TWO VILLAINS ARE SELECTED, ONE MALE, ONE FEMALE. THESE VILLAINS, ALONG WITH ALL THE ONES FROM OTHER GALAXIES, WILL BE PLACED IN A LARGE SPACE, FILLED WITH ARTIFICIAL FORESTS, LAKES, AND OCCASIONAL SURPRISES, AND THEY WILL BE TASKED TO KILL EACH OTHER, UNTIL ONLY ONE IS LEFT STANDING."

Every villain in the clearing immediately looked incredibly concerned. Wander's eyes widened, and he looked horrified. Sylvia put a hand on his shoulder.

"THESE VILLAINS WILL HAVE ONE DAY TO TRAIN BEFORE THE GAMES BEGIN. IF THEY HURT ANY OTHER VILLAINS DURING THIS TIME, THEY WILL BE KILLED. VIOLENTLY. NO VILLAIN CAN ENTER THE GAMES USING ANY EQUIPMENT; EVERYTHING WILL BE UP TO THEIR INDIVIDUAL SKILL. MAGICAL ITEMS ARE PROHIBITED AND WILL BE DESTROYED. THE WINNER WILL BE REWARDED WITH RICHES AND POWER BEYOND THEIR WILDEST DREAMS! ANY QUESTIONS?"

Peepers raised a finger.

"NO QUESTIONS? GOOD! NOW FOR THE SELECTION ANNOUNCEMENTS! THE PREVIOUS SELECTED VILLAINS ARE AS FOLLOWS...

1000 BEES AND THE DARKNESS FROM GALAXY NUMBER 1.  
ENRAGED ANIK AND JANICE THE MANICE FROM GALAXY NUMBER 2.  
THE COLLECTOR AND CALLICE FROM GALAXY NUMBER 3.  
LADY LEAD AND PROFESSOR PLAGUE FROM GALAXY NUMBER 4.

Wander and Sylvia’s eyes widened and they looked at each other worriedly. One of those names was all too familiar to them.

AND FINALLY, WE WILL NOW ANNOUNCE THE SELECTED VILLAINS FROM THE FINAL GALAXY, GALAXY NUMBER 5. AS IS CUSTOMARY, LADIES FIRST!"

Despite the situation, Sylvia rolled her eyes. 

"AND THE FEMALE CONTESTANT WILL BE... LORD DOMINATOR!"

Absolutely nobody was surprised. People looked at each other with glances of varying degrees of relief or worry. There was a chance that Dominator was out of their hair forever, but there was also a pretty good chance that she'd end up winning the games and would gain enough power to start destroying everything all over again.  
Wander, meanwhile, was beginning to panic for entirely different reasons. He looked over at Hater with nervousness written all over his expression. Surely Hater would end up being chosen as the second contestant? At this point, there was pretty much no contest. Sylvia and Peepers seemed to be having the same thought. As Peepers gained Hater's attention and began urging him to to get the grop out of here, Sylvia leaned her head down to Wander's height.

"Don't worry, buddy, it's all gonna be fine. These guys can't be as bad as Dominator; if they try to grab anyone, we'll just beat them like we beat her, alright?"

"I don't know, Syl. I'm getting a real bad feeling..."

"Wander, it's fine, Hater can handle himself. Look at him."

Wander looked over at Hater, who was currently standing and glaring angrily at Peepers, electricity crackling all around him. Wander’s face became sullen, and he thought of the brief glimpse of green lightning he'd seen dancing around the outside of his orble bubble when he was rescuing himself and Dominator from her own ship. Hater had protected him back there, and Wander would have a guilty conscience forever if he let this go without trying to save his friend.

"... I think I should volunteer to go instead."

"WHAT?!"

Sylvia's shocked and enraged shout startled the people around her, who were briefly distracted from the announcer's voice.

Wander continued in an urgent whisper. "Hater saved me and Dominator back there! I can't just let him enter something like this! That'd just be plain ungrateful!"

"Wander, I swear to flarp, if you go off and do something like this right after I just got you back-"

"I'm sorry Sylvia, but I've got to help!"  
He raised a hand and was about to yell out to the screen, but Sylvia clapped a hand over his mouth before he could say anything. The screen began talking again.

"AND NOW, FOR THE FINAL CONTESTANT OF THE GAMES! KEEP YOUR EARS PEELED! THE MALE CONTESTANT FOR GALAXY NUMBER 5 WILL BE..."

Hater seemed to finally catch onto what was about to happen, and his eyes widened. He looked at Wander, who was desperately trying to pull Sylvia's hand away from his face so he could volunteer. Hater backed into the crowd a bit, and Peepers followed him, trying to seem as indistinct as possible. Almost everyone watched Hater and Peepers expectantly (and somewhat worriedly) as they tried to escape the scene.

As Wander began debating with himself on whether or not biting his friend's hand would be a morally acceptable option in this situation, the announcer said something that made his and everyone else's blood run cold.

"... WANDER! CONGRATULATIONS, CONTESTANT! YOU'LL BE PARTICIPATING IN THE 50TH ANNUAL GALAXY GAMES!"


	2. In Which Wander is Not Good With the Ladies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early Halloween Update!! Just imagine me throwing words into your pillowcases instead of candy. Eat it and you will Learn.
> 
> Anyway here's this

A breath of air rushed through the clearing as every audience member seemed to stop breathing at the same time. Everyone who could turned to look at the small, incredibly confused nomad. In shock, Sylvia had stopped holding her hand over his mouth.

"... Pardon me?"

As if in answer to Wander's question, the screen lit up suddenly with a picture of his own smiling face, printed on a Wanted poster. His eyes widened. Ohhh... that explains that.

"NOW, IF OUR FINAL CONTESTANT WOULD STEP UP TO THE SCREEN, PREPARATIONS FOR THE GAMES CAN FINALLY BEGIN!"

Sylvia grabbed Wander and held him close to her chest, then backed up into the crowd behind them. The surrounding people, seeming to have the same goal in mind, stepped up in front of the two. If there was one thing everyone on the Secret Planet knew, it was that this was a horrible, horrible mistake. 

Hater, despite himself, was feeling a little cheated. "Um, EXCUSE ME? Since when is Sunshine Banjo-face over there the most EVIL GUY IN THE GALAXY?!"

Peepers leaned over to Hater and spoke in a harsh whisper. "Since you set up all those wanted posters, remember? And all the Bounty hunters?"

Hater's face slowly sunk in understanding. "Ooooooh. Right, forgot about that."

Everyone in earshot of Hater immediately turned and glared at him. He shrunk in on himself a little bit. "Whoops."

Sylvia held Wander a little tighter. "Listen, buddy, I know you want to protect all the other villains and all or whatever, but you really, really don't want to play these games, alright? This is really bad news... you could get killed in there!"

Wander looked at the screen as he thought of all the announcer had said. A competition where the top villains in each galaxy try to kill each other to be number one? That meant a bunch of folks like Dominator were going to be trying to kill him for who knows how long, and they wouldn't stop until... yeah.  
But then again, if he and Sylvia escaped, what if Hater was thrown in the tournament...?

"... Sylvia, I-"

A blue beam suddenly shot out of the ship above them, and zeroed in straight on Wander's position. Before anyone could make a move, he was already rising up in the air. Sylvia yelped and grabbed his ankle. "Whoa there, pal!"  
The beam stopped for a second, then seemed to calibrate and start lifting Sylvia along with him. She looked down at the shocked crowd of people below in desperation. "A little help here?!"

It took not two seconds for them all to get the hint. It started with Jeff, who grabbed onto Sylvia's feet, then everyone else around him clambered up and tried the best they could to weigh down their two heroes. After a moment's hesitation and a hastily exchanged glance with Peepers, Hater started trying to use his powers to pull them back down to the ground as well. The beam seemed to flicker, then its light grew in intensity along with its power.  
At this point, everyone was holding on as best they could, but even the people at the bottom of the crowd were losing their footing on the dirt.

"I'm not... letting you... go!" Sylvia managed, her voice straining with effort. Wander, despite the growing pain in his ankle from all this weight, was now only worried for the safety of his friends. He grabbed onto Sylvia's hands, and she switched from hanging onto his leg to hanging from those, which caused a jolt to go through everyone below. 

"Syl..."

Sylvia opened her eyes, to see her best friend looking at her with a sort of sad determination. 

"I'll be alright..."

Her brow scrunched up in worry, and it was only a moment before the beam grew even brighter and the pull was just too strong. Their hands were slowly pulled apart, and as soon as they separated, everyone fell back to the ground, Hater being knocked over as well, and Wander shot up into the air. Before he disappeared into the ship, he took off his hat and aimed for Sylvia, then disappeared behind the closed panel as the article of clothing floated gently back down to the planet's surface.

Everyone laid on the ground in a groaning, unhappy pile of people. Sylvia hastily moved people out of her way and tumbled to the ground in her effort to catch the hat. She ran a hand over it and looked back up at the ship. It was dark and still, just as it was before. It was as if it hadn't even just stolen her best friend.

Everyone climbing to their feet looked varying degrees of lost, and some of the villains, Hater included, looked shocked and confused.

The screen switched back to its logo and happy music began playing as a background to the announcer's voice.

"GOOD LUCK, GALAXY NUMBER FIVE! IF YOUR CONTESTANTS ARE GOOD ENOUGH, ONE OF THEM JUST MIGHT SURVIVE!"

Despite the fact that the destruction of the entire Galaxy had just occurred previous to this, the planet's residents had never felt so hopeless.

...

It had been a long time since Wander could remember having this much trouble waking up in the morning, discounting those times he'd been sick, but those were very few and far in-between.  
But this time, he almost had to pry his own eyes open. He laid there completely disoriented for a couple minutes before he could sit up and assess the situation properly. He sat up on his cot (since when did he have one of those?) and looked around the completely unremarkable bluish-grey room he had been placed in. It took him a few moments before he could put his thoughts together and figure out how this had happened. The Galaxy Games... he was signed up against his will (very rude, if he did say so himself) and was pulled up into the ship, then... nothing.  
He felt up on his head to try and straighten his hat, and then remembered that it wasn't there anymore. He instead ran a hand through the fur on the top of his head nervously. He was all alone, with nobody to help him, faced with the unknown and the inevitability of people trying to kill him.  
Again, it was rare that this sort of thing would happen to him. Well, most of it, at least.

He sighed. "Alright, Wander, looks like you've gotten yourself into another dangerous situation, and I guess this time you're the only one who can help yourself out of it... well, unless Dominator wants to help... but I reckon she's still a bit too cross at us all blowing up her ship, and ruining her plans for galactic domination and everything..."  
He rubbed the back of his neck, which stung a little for some reason. "Well, a bad attitude has never helped anyone, after all, you start down the right path, and you end up in the right place!"

Just then, a loud, electronic bell rang out, and the door across from where he was sitting suddenly opened. Wander blinked, trying not to think about exactly how... wrong this place was. He got up on his feet, and hesitantly walked towards the door, peeking out of it and looking down the hall. 

"... Hellooo? Anybody there?"

... ten seconds passed, and there was no answer. Wander decided to venture out a bit further. He walked out of the room slowly, and entered the light blue hallway. Down the hall was a pair of double doors, but other than that, there was nothing. The entire hallway was about thirty feet long, and Wander walked down it slowly, calling out every now and then just to make sure. Nobody answered, but as soon as he reached the double doors, they opened by themselves. Wander paused, then walked through them.

Beyond the doors was an entirely different scenario. They lead into a small glass room, which separated the nomad from a giant room the size of a large gym. If Wander had to guess, he would assume that the glass walls were set to lift up at some time and allow him access to the training room... but he wasn't altogether very excited for that to happen.  
Looking around the room, Wander noticed that there were nine other small glass rooms set all across the walls of the training arena. Although, it appeared that he was the first one awake. He looked around in the room. It seemed to be designed to contain him.  
The doors, as though realizing that themselves, shut very suddenly, effectively preventing him from escaping. Wander shrugged, then sat down. There wasn't all that much to explore here, was there?

He could have only been sitting there for about 30 minutes, but to Wander it felt so much longer. With absolutely nothing to do or to look at, he felt like he was stuck with the black hole all over again. He tried not to think about food this time, though. That would be... unproductive.  
He instead began to think about the other contestants. Some of their approaches to being villains were pretty obvious, if their names were anything to go by. The villain called Professor Plague sounded like he was someone focused mainly on causing sickness. Enraged Anik sounded like a very… passionate fellow. The villains called The Darkness and Janice the Manice, however, could honestly be anything, and the 1000 bees… well, he’d have to come back to that later.  
As for the one villain he and Sylvia remembered too well… Lady Lead. A long time ago, Wander had found himself spending a lot of time with that particular villain. That wouldn’t be that bad, had he wanted to be there in the first place…  
He guessed he could thank her for accidentally causing him and Sylvia to meet, even if their encounters after that had been less than friendly.  
Overall, Wander was just relieved to see that she was alive, even if she’d put him and his friend through a lot. Although, there was still time for that to change… Wander frowned. He felt more conflicted about that than he was altogether comfortable with...

"You have GOT to be kidding me."

Wander looked up in surprise at the unexpected voice, and quickly noticed that in the glass room on his left, there stood another person. She was tall and broad, and had little flowers and spikes spiraling up and down her two legs and her torso. Her arms ended in sharp points and her shoulders were covered in brambles. Her face was surprisingly gentle looking, with four bright eyes the color of lilacs, and what can be assumed to be a mouth covered entirely with leaves. On top of her head was just more brambles. Despite the leaves covering her mouth, her voice rang clear and cold, if a bit rough around the edges.  
All four of her eyes glared down at Wander.

"I assumed that this 'game' was for highest ranking villains, not lollipops covered in hair. What a joke." She scoffed, crossing her arms and looking towards the training arena.

Wander smiled at her warmly, completely disregarding her cold words. "Oh! Hi there, sorry, I wasn't expecting anyone for a while. Folks in my galaxy call me Wander! What’s your name?" He gave her his full attention.

The yet unidentified villain was caught almost completely off guard. She'd expected him to rise to her challenge, or at least act somewhat villain-like. Was this actually a mistake? She glared at him stubbornly. "What, like I'm just going to back down like that? Do you think I'm stupid?!"

"Well of course not! You look like a sharp person, uh, pun unintended. I'd just love to put a name to face, and what a lovely face it is!" He winked.

"...What?! What is this?! Are you patronizing me? Is this the game you're playing?"

"... I think we're supposed to be playing a whole different game, actually. I don't really know when that's gonna start, but even if I don't know your name, I wish you the best of luck! Not that I think you're going to need it, anyway."  
Wander gave a thumbs up, then, deciding that he would stop bothering the villain, looked back down at his own lap and started twiddling his thumbs. There was a peaceful pause that lasted about 15 whole seconds.

"... It's Callice."

He looked up, surprised, and opened his mouth-

A bell suddenly rang, and all the glass room walls lifted off the ground, giving the unnoticed and sparsely gathered villains access to the training room. The newly named Callice ran over to the middle of the room to look at the equipment without another word. Wander, in the midst of all the sudden commotion, smiled to himself. Maybe this place wouldn't be so horrible after all.

Then, he noticed Dominator. Or, more accurately, Dominator noticed him.  
He had just been walking over to explore the training area and introduce himself to the other contestants, when he was suddenly and harshly lifted up by the scruff of his neck, and the incredibly annoyed visage of Dominator's face (without any of her armor) enveloped his entire field of vision.

"Alright you little punk, I know why I've been dragged into this whiney baby fight, but I don't know why the Universe decided to torture me even more by bringing you here too." She shoved an ungloved finger into his chest. "So you better stay OUT of my way, I don't want to see you, I don't want to hear you, and I sure don't want to SMELL you, you dirty rat. If you come near me, I'll destroy you faster than you can say one of your stupid rhymey moral catchphrases. Capisce?"

Wander opened his mouth to say something, but then decided that he'd better avoid getting destroyed so soon, and closed his mouth once more. He nodded. 

Dominator put a hand up to her forehead and dropped him onto the floor. "Good. Ungh, this is going to be a LONG couple of weeks."  
She walked off somewhere away from the training equipment, leaving Wander in a heap on the ground. 

Wander got up and stared after her, before looking back at where he'd been heading before. A few of the gathered villains looked away, as if to avoid being caught watching what had just transpired. Wander sighed, feeling a bit tired and unlike himself. He could agree with Dominator on one thing: this was going to be a long couple of weeks.  
However, instead of destroying everyone, Wander had decidedly tasked himself with trying to keep everyone alive. It was the least he could do in this situation, other than try to get to know everyone and stay alive himself. No matter how tough it seemed, Wander was had sworn to help everyone he could, even if the people he was trying his best to help were trying equally as hard to kill him.

How hard could it be?

Wander avoided jinxing himself out loud as he took in all the training equipment before him. Most of it was pretty self explanatory, with some target practice, knife throwing, and basic survival training stations, but some were a bit harder to grasp immediately, such as a small garden and a large tank of water set in the middle of the room. Wander looked further into these two stations and discovered that they were for poison plant identification and swimming/holding your breath practice, respectively.  
Well, no need for him to worry about either of those.  
Wander decided that it was about time he put a hold on exploring and tried to introduce himself to the other contestants around him, who seemed to be doing their best to avoid each other as much as possible.  
"That just won't do," Wander muttered to himself, shaking his head a little. He saw a random villain in a long coat at the knife-throwing station, and decided to start out with him.  
He walked over to the man, and waited until he wasn't actively holding a knife to let his presence be known.

"Hi there!" he said, holding out a hand in greeting. "Folks in my galaxy call me Wander, what's your name?"

The man froze in place, and turned around slowly. He was tall, taller than the previous villain Wander had met, and so he loomed over the nomad as he looked him over. The villain was lanky and his form was covered almost entirely by his clothes. He wore a trench coat, boots, gloves, and a small pair of reading glasses over his big, literal bug eyes. He appeared to have the head of a fly.  
The unnamed villain leaned down as far as he could go, and squinted at Wander, who was beginning to feel slightly uncomfortable. But he was nothing if not stubborn. Wander smiled nervously and lifted his hand for a handshake. The villain looked at his hand, and grabbed it, appearing to look that over as well. This was one of Wander's stranger hand-shaking experiences.

"Curious..." the villain muttered, turning Wander's hand over.

"Um..." replied Wander.

"Oh, how rude of me," said the villain, still not letting go of Wander's hand. "I haven't introduced myself... they call me the Collector."

Despite being the optimist that he was, Wander could already see this situation turning south.  
"That's... a lovely name!" he said, slowly taking his hand back. "A lovely name for a very talented knife thrower." He looked at the target the Collector was aiming at, and couldn't help noticing that all the knives had hit inside the center circle of the target. "That's... super impressive! How long have you been throwing knives?"

The Collector sat back on his haunches and grabbed another knife, placing one of his gloved finger's pads on the point. "As long as I have been collecting, I gather." he said quietly. It was unclear whether or not his pun was intentional, which somehow made his statement more foreboding.

Wander nodded slowly, trying to keep an indulging smile on his face. "Wow, that's very interesting! What do you collect, if you don't mind me asking...?"

The Collector stood up completely and threw the knife he was holding directly in the center of the target. "Rare species of creature. Sometimes that means raiding different planets, sometimes it could mean moving to entirely different galaxies." He stewed in thoughtful silence for a moment, and then looked back down at Wander, his glasses shining in the room's artificial light.  
"See you in the arena, Wander."  
He walked away from the station, leaving Wander in uncomfortable silence.

Wander shifted in place and looked around the rest of the room. He saw Callice staring at him before she turned to look in a different direction almost irritably. Dominator, meanwhile, was nowhere to be seen. 

Wander ran his hand through his fur. A long couple weeks indeed.

...

Presumably unknown to the contestants currently residing in the ship, cameras had been set up to monitor the entire training area. The feed was broadcast directly to the screens in every galaxy participating in the games, as well as the screen attached directly to the main ship, which was still hovering above the (not so secret anymore) Secret Planet. People had arranged themselves around the screen almost like it was a movie showing in a park, except everyone was worried out of their minds and only staying by the screen for fear of being uninformed. Ever since Wander entered the camera's view early in the morning, everyone who called themselves his friend (or his one true enemy) was watching curiously and nervously. Sylvia was, unsurprisingly, topping everyone in the nerves department. They couldn't hear anything that was said, but Wander's actions and expressions were pretty easy to read in any given scenario. He seemed nervous most of the time, which didn't exactly help calm anyone else down.

Sylvia found herself caught between pacing frantically and watching the screen whenever something seemed to be happening. When Dominator had bothered him, she swore he was going to die right then and there, and could feel her heart skip a beat. Fortunately he had gotten out fine, but that didn't make her feel much better about the obvious threats Dominator had been exchanging the entire interaction. That whole scenario on top of the second encounter he'd had shortly after that were enough to make Sylvia experience a ghost of what she assumed heart failure felt like. The fear that her best friend had briefly let cross his expression was enough to kick her into seeking actual help.

“Who better to receive help from than your enemies?” Is what Wander would probably say. Sylvia guessed she didn't really have much of a choice at that point.

"Uh, tell me WHY we should help you again?" said Hater, a finger picking in the ear he didn't even have.

Sylvia mustered up her remaining scraps of self control to avoid strangling the man with his own cloak. "Because you got him into this mess in the first place, and because he was willing to sacrifice himself to save you, anyway."

"Uh, yeah? That's sort of what he does?"

Peepers’ groan was exasperated as he face-palmed in the only way an eyeball could. "Sir, please, can we just get this whole thing over with? We can leave, or we can stay and help your sworn enemy, but we can't do both."

Hater made a severely exaggerated face of contemplation. "Hmmm... let me see... I'm gonna have to go wiiiiiiiiiith NO."

Sylvia stomped the ground and clenched her fists. "Would you JUST- I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU- URGH... look," she pointed at the screen, where Wander was attempting to introduce himself to a dusty-green lizard-looking alien only a few inches taller than him. "If we don't get him out of there, he WILL die, okay? I’m not gonna sweeten this up. I know he usually has a knack for getting out of things, but this time, there's just... too much, and he knows that."  
On the screen the lizard villain appeared to have yelled at Wander and threatened him with a sword before stalking off somewhere else, leaving him there waving goodbye and smiling a bit shakily. Hater squinted his eyes at the screen as Sylvia continued talking.  
"I know you've got a problem with the both of us- especially him- but you're the only one here who has the power to take down Dominator's ship, the engineers that can build whatever you ask them to, and the nerd who figured out how to get here in the first place."

Peepers looked up at Hater and decided not to mention who had actually figured out where the Secret Planet was. Hater was still looking up at the screen in thought.

"Not to mention that if he dies, you'll never get a chance to destroy him yourself. You'll have to live with the knowledge that you couldn't even get rid of your own worst enemy!"

Hater turned back to Sylvia to glare at her. Sylvia just held out a hand.

"So, deal? Are you going to help?"

Hater looked down at Sylvia's hand, back at the screen, and then at Sylvia's expression. He sighed heavily and slumped his shoulders, then grabbed her hand and shook it. "Fine, BUT DON'T READ INTO THIS!"

Sylvia sighed with relief. "You got it. So, Peepers, you ready to put that plan-making brain to use?"

Peepers sighed with tired resignation. "Why do I even bother..." He turned around and called several Watchdogs over to help. Sylvia looked back up at the screen, where Wander was carefully picking up weapons and reorganizing them on their shelves. She winced.  
If they didn't come up with something soon, she didn't want to think about what those weapons could do once they were in the hands of someone other than Wander.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween! Remember to treat yourself, not trick yourself. Because that would be counterproductive. And if you're reading this in the future, what is it like? Am I still inconsistent at updating???
> 
> If you think you found an upload error please tell me! See you next time!!


	3. HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT

Wander woke up the next morning with absolutely no recollection of falling asleep. He was beginning to sense a pattern...  
Although, this time, there was an extra variable: breakfast.   
He was woken up (unusually groggy once again, what was that about?) to the smell of pancakes. He sat up and sure enough, there was a plate filled with food right in front of his door. Wander grinned. How nice of them... whoever 'them' was, anyway. He walked over and grabbed the plate, and immediately dug in. It was not only pancakes, but also eggs, bacon, and a glass of orange juice. He carefully placed the bacon to the side of the plate, unwilling to eat that, even considering how hungry he was. He didn't doubt that it tasted fantastic, though.  
Even under the circumstances, having a filling breakfast easily brightened Wander's mood. Since he had nothing left to do for the remaining time he had to spend in the room, he decided to clear his mind. His current surroundings were not... optimal, for meditation, but they'd have to do. He got into the lotus position, and began trying to focus on only breathing and humming.

Unfortunately, in stressful situations, clearing your mind is made a lot more difficult. Wander quietly pondered on his current state of being, and found himself trying to recall the last part of the day before. The last thing he could remember before blacking out was a bell ringing. He and the other contestants had been in the training room for quite awhile by that point, and he'd tried to introduce himself to everyone in the area. Unfortunately, not all of the contestants had decided to show up, so he couldn't get a good enough read on everyone before the day had just... ended. Wander inhaled and exhaled carefully. How long would it be before the games would start? He hadn't even asked Callice what her favorite color was yet. He guessed it would be dark purple. She seemed like a purple kind of person...

Wander continued thinking of all the other villains as a way to sort of calm himself down. It was working only as well as it could. After awhile, he realized that it was about the time to come up with a plan. Possibilities of the future ran through his mind, and ideas continually popped into his head.

 

Yes, that could work...

Suddenly, the door to the room opened, but Wander was too deep in his thoughts to notice the disruption. The person at the door was wearing what looked like a complete hazmat suit, and was gripping a blast shield. They waited for a few moments, and then peeked over the shield curiously. Wander still hadn't noticed them, and he had a gentle smile on his face.  
This was a bit of an eyebrow raising moment for the alien at the door. Usually on the game day, there was a bit of resistance. This guy was not only a tiny, fuzzy fellow, but he was also very obviously meditating.

"... Hey, contestant number 10, wake up."   
They spoke in a high pitched voice.

Wander's eyes blinked open and focused on the suited worker. "Oh, well hello there!" 

"Uh, yeah, you're supposed to be coming with me. Don't try anything, okay?"

"Can I try to offer a friendly hug?"

"No."

"Aw, alright."

Wander stood up, dusted himself off, and walked behind the suited worker, who he assumed was leading him to where the games would be starting. If he felt any apprehension, he wasn't going to let it show. He didn't want to make the person leading him feel bad.  
Meanwhile, the suited worker was less than thrilled at this development. They really hoped this little furry guy was just pretending to be nice, otherwise...

They reached the end of the hallway and the worker pressed their hand against a panel on the wall. Machinery whirred, then the doors opened to an entirely different place than they had the last time. Wander looked starstruck. That was pretty amazing!  
As he was led into the room, the doors closing behind him, he couldn't help exploring the place with his eyes. The room was mostly empty, but for a strange circular platform at the opposite end of it, and a table next to it which was covered in a multitude of things he would enjoy going over to look at...

"Don't touch anything."

Wander looked up from the doodad he was about to touch. His reeled his arm back and smiled at the worker, who looked at him for a second before returning to what they were messing with on the table. Wander looked around the rest of the room and rubbed his arm nonchalantly. He looked back at the table. Boy did he want to touch some of those things... 

The worker turned back around just as he was lifting his arm up again and he quickly put both arms behind his back and tried to look as innocent as possible. Then, he saw what they were holding.  
A syringe.

Wander's mouth went dry. "Uhh..."

"Hold still, this is a tracker-"

That was definitely NOT a good sentence to hear for him. Wander took a step backwards.

"Hey, I said don't try anything!"

"I'm real sorry, I, uh..." He didn't exactly know how to put his feelings about needles into words. Maybe it was the entire feeling of hospitals in general that got to him. The idea of being tracked wasn't exactly a good feeling, either. If anything, it was terrifying. He took another few steps back, and the worker only stepped towards him at a quicker rate.

"It doesn't even hurt that bad, it's just a little sting and then it goes away!" The worker honestly felt like they were talking to a child, not a villain. This didn't help settle the tight feeling in their chest.

A few more seconds passed by with Wander backing up and the worker stepping forward, until his back hit the door. Suddenly, he was being quite literally backed into a wall. The worker slowly lowered themself down, and then tried to grab him in one quick move, but Wander was too fast. He ran over to the opposite wall and stood against it and the suited worker stood up again.

"Come on, seriously? We only have so much time before you have to go out there. Do you want me to get fired?!"  
They hadn't really meant to divulge so much information, but the situation was growing dire.

"Really, I'm sorry!" Wander squeaked out. "I'm just not a very big fan of needles... are you really going to get fired?"

The worker paused for a long moment, and then nodded. Wander looked conflicted. His eyes swiveled around the room as he grew more anxious about the situation. He didn't want to go near that needle, but he couldn't just let someone lose their job over him. 

The worker watched him. Truthfully, if there was going to be any further interruptions, they could just call in some backup to hold the little guy down. But this way was a lot easier, if a bit unusual.

Wander finally seemed to give in. "Alright, alright, I wouldn't wish ill on you, you're just doing your job after all." He inched forward a little and slowly raised his arm up.

The worker quickly knelt down and injected the tracker in his arm. The process took only a couple seconds, but that didn't make it any less unpleasant. Wander poked at the spot of the injection. If he pulled back his fur a little bit, he could see the faintest blinking light disappearing under his skin. He winced, quietly wishing that he had at least gotten a band-aid.  
"Is that all?"

The worker walked back to the table and put the syringe down.   
"Typically, every contestant in the games is made a fitted jumpsuit to use, but you don't technically have to wear it if you don't want to."

Wander looked mildly concerned. How would they have even gotten his measurements for that. "Sooo... I can just go into the games how I am?"

"I can give you official shoes, if you want."

Wander looked down at his worn shoes. "... I like my shoes..."

The worker sighed. "Alright, well, I guess you're good to go." They gestured to the circular platform a few feet away. Wander looked at it for a second, and then back at the worker.

"So... once I step onto that, there's no going back?"

"There's not really any going back anyway, but yes. The games start in a few minutes, so you'd better get going."

Wander looked back and forth between the worker and the platform for a few seconds, then smiled. "Sure you don't want to change your mind about the hug?"

The worker looked at him, expression completely covered and therefore unreadable. "No, I'm good. You'd better step onto the platform."

Wander lowered his arms, smile unchanging. "Alright then, thank you for all your help! If I had my hat, I'd tip it to you."  
He walked over to the platform and paused for a second, then stepped onto it and stood still. There was a pause of about five seconds, then a glass tube fell around the platform. Wander smiled at the worker, and the platform began rising up.

"Good luck," the worker said, almost inaudibly. "You're going to need it..."

"I'm gonna what?" came Wander's muffled yell from behind the glass, but then he was gone from their view, and the games were about to begin.

...

As the screen suddenly turned on in the late morning, everyone couldn't help but to watch. They at first showed nothing but a grassy field viewed from the sky, and in it an array of steel-covered holes arranged in a circle around a pile of random weapons and bags. There was a timer of 20 seconds in the corner of the screen, but it was yet unchanging. The field was completely silent. The people watching, however, were not.

"Great, what's this all about? Will they all just be beating the snot out of each other in a meadow?"  
Sylvia stood angrily and glared at the peaceful imagery on the screen. 

Peepers squinted his eyes at the scene. "From what I can tell, the contestants will be raised up on those platforms, the timer will go off, and once it hits zero, they'll all be clambering over each other to get as much stuff as possible. That, or to kill as many people as they can. You know, despite the obviously dire circumstances, I'm actually pretty curious to see what Wander will do. Or even Dominator, for that matter."

Sylvia clenched her fists. She was too stressed out to even answer that without exploding, and she knew it. It was just... so difficult, knowing that this all was happening. She went through life-threatening adventures with Wander almost every week, heck, sometimes every day, but now they were separated, and he was all alone. She just wanted to be facing this with him.  
This was different than fighting a giant space worm, or running away from an army of bad guys. This was possibly their biggest challenge yet, and that was because they weren't facing it together.

Everyone else around Sylvia murmured to each other about the games. How they thought it would go, who they thought could win, whether or not Wander could get himself out of this one... stuff like that. She had to force herself to tune it out, lest she hear someone say something negative, and end up adding injury to insult.

The atmosphere changed suddenly as a loud electronic bell sound rang from the screen. Everyone paused and waited, some curling into themselves in anxiousness. The air was heavy with anxiety as they all stared at the screen.

With a loud, booming ticking sound, the timer started counting down, and platforms started raising from the steel traps in the ground. In only five seconds, the timer was a quarter of the way down, and all the contestants stood on their platforms, blinking around the arena. The camera view began switching around to show different angles and different contestants. Every villain immediately started either taking tense stances, or looking around the woods for a good place to hide.

Sylvia immediately found Wander, as he was honestly the brightest colored one there (and the only one not wearing clothes, besides the plant one). Surprisingly enough, after the initial confused blinking around in his surroundings, Wander began to look actually determined to do something. He got into a runner's starting position, eyes toward the pile of food, supplies, and weapons in the center of the circle. People around Sylvia began muttering curiously.

Meanwhile, Dominator was standing casually, looking like nerves were a thing she hadn't even heard of. She was still wearing none of her armor, and her arms were glove-less and crossed irritably. She occasionally scratched uncomfortably at the black jumpsuit she wore, and rolled her eyes as the timer ticked down to five seconds.

5...  
The ticking seemed to grow louder. Sylvia felt her chest tighten even more as each second passed.  
4, 3...  
Many members of the audience were having trouble breathing, their hearts beating faster and faster with every moment. The tension in the air was palpable.   
2...  
Every contestant, even Dominator to an extent, tensed.  
1...

...

A loud bell rang throughout the clearing, and Wander immediately bolted towards a coil of rope he'd spotted near the center of the pile. He was going to need that.  
He reached the pile and the coil of rope before most of the other contestants had even come within 15 feet of the first weapon. Being so small and with so much energy, Wander had a clear advantage in the speed department. He grabbed the rope and uncoiled some of it, then looked around for his first target.  
Wander zeroed in on a set of hand-axes five feet away. One of the villains currently heading towards the set of axes stopped in their tracks as he sprinted towards the weapons and grabbed them. Expecting the worst, they got into a fighting stance, but Wander only used the rope to tie the two together, then ran towards the next weapon he saw.  
He began to look like an orange blur as he sped all around the area, picking up and tying together every dangerous object set out for use of the contestants. Some of the villains chased after him in furious pursuit of the weapons, but Wander dodged around them as best he could, the clanking and ringing of metal weapons punctuating all his movements.  
Once he thought he had all the weapons, Wander stopped, but a glint of sunlight caused his attention to be focused on the Collector, who had managed to grab a single throwing knife before Wander had pillaged the rest. The villain aimed at his target and threw the knife... straight towards Dominator, who was watching glaring at Wander, unaware of the incoming threat. Wander's eyes widened, and he lifted up his bundle of weapons and darted over towards the line of fire.   
Just as Dominator realized what was happening, Wander was already jumping up in front of the knife, bundle of weapons held as a shield. The knife stuck itself inside the mess of objects, narrowly missing the rope tying the whole thing together. Wander landed on his back and skidded in the dirt. It took him about 5 seconds to get back up and reassess the situation.  
All the villains that weren't staring at him with confused expressions were currently running towards him with murderous intent, so Wander quickly used the rest of the rope to secure the bundle of metal to his back with hastily fashioned harness, and then bolted into the woods as fast as his legs could carry him.

His plan was going pretty well, and Wander was relieved, despite the fact that everyone's less-than-friendly intent was focused on him at the moment.  
Then, there was the familiar sound of fire and lava manifesting, and a strangled scream echoed around the clearing. Wander stopped running and turned around, as did everyone else.

Dominator stood silently next to the charred and unconscious form of a familiar lizard-man. Enraged Anik was his name, Wander recalled.  
He didn't appear to be breathing, and Dominator's clenched fist was dripping red with blazing hot lava.  
The horrified realization was shared by every contestant at once.  
Dominator didn't need weapons, she WAS her own weapon. It hadn't been the gloves.  
With this thought stuck in their minds, every other villain ran for the trees, some of them shooting Wander threatening glances, which he didn't notice.  
Wander was still looking at Anik.

As everyone disappeared, Wander and Dominator looked at each other. Dominator regarded him coldly. She just stood there silently for a few moments, then turned around, grabbed a couple bags of supplies and food off of the ground, and headed out of sight.   
As soon as he couldn't see her anymore, Wander bee-lined directly towards Anik. Maybe he could still save him, it's hard to tell if people are breathing or not with distance, he could still be okay with a bit of help!  
He slowed down and knelt by the villain, taking off the harness to focus entirely on Anik. He looked him over, assessing the damage. It was bad. There was a hole burned through the center of the charred mess that was Anik's jumpsuit, and it was still sizzling faintly. Wander carefully leaned over to see what the wound looked like, and then pulled back quickly, a hand over his mouth and tears in his eyes. He looked over at the villain's head, and gently placed two fingers to his neck, checking for a pulse.  
He waited, and waited...  
Wander closed his eyes. After a couple beats of silence, he did the same for Anik. Then, he got up from the ground and put the harness back on.

The loud bang of a canon sounded from somewhere in the sky, and Wander sobbed, then ran into the woods, leaving the cooling body behind.

The Galaxy Games had finally begun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY I SHOULD REALLY WRITE THAT 5TH CHAPTER BEFORE NEXT MONDAY, HUH?  
> If you spot an error, please tell me! Until next time!


	4. Home-sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are only getting worse from here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was reluctant to update with this chapter, considering I haven't yet finished chapter 5, but you guys deserve an update. Here you go!

One could run barefoot over hot coals in blazing summer sunlight and not feel the kind of burning pain Sylvia felt in her chest just watching the games. It was hard enough just knowing the danger Wander was in, but seeing him so deeply affected and grief-stricken like that sent a shock through her whole system. She wanted more than anything to bust into the arena and save her friend, but first, they had to have a plan.

Sylvia, Hater, Peepers, and Jeff- who had refused to leave when he found out they were making a plan- all sat around and tried to ignore the happenings on the screen while they collectively brainstormed ideas. Well, while most of them brainstormed ideas. Hater was actually focused more on the screen.

In contrast to its previous almost movie-like camera angles, which showed the first battle (if you could even call it that) in its entirety, the newly self-deliberately-separated contestants were displayed each within their own section of the screen. It did not, at the moment, have sound, since the messy background noise would have taken attention away from what was happening in the 9 individual squares of visual action. The villains seemed to be preparing, mostly, and they in general looked incredibly frustrated about their lack of weapons. All had managed to grab a bag of supplies or two, but that did not seem to affect their mood very positively at all. Some were seen setting up their own sub-par camps, and others appeared to be prowling around the woodland area. They were either hunting for food, or for the one who had stolen their weapons. From the cold expressions on their faces, it was almost impossible to tell. Maybe for some of them, it was both.  
Villains can become rather cross when their weapons are taken away from them. If he were to be perfectly honest (which was not likely), Hater could relate.

From what Hater could see, Wander didn't really seem to care that much about that was against him. As soon as he had gained some good distance from where he believed any other contestants were, he had climbed a tree as high as he could go and placed the heavy bag of weapons down on the topmost branches with him. If someone was going to try and steal them, they would have a pretty difficult time, especially since so far up, the branches were frail, and Wander was officially the only person left who was light and small enough for them to support his weight. Just keeping the weapons secure on the branches was a challenge, because some of them were decently sized and rather heavy, but the nomad had managed to deal with that by using some more rope.  
The weapons would be completely safe where they were, since Wander knew that the only person with a chance left of getting up there was… gone.  
Wander seemed to be thinking about that above all else. Without his hat to conceal it, his incredibly downcast expression was all too visible. Out of all the villains, he seemed to be the only one who cared about Anik's death.

Hater rolled his eyes. Even in a fight-or-die situation, Wander was utterly predictable.

"The question is, how are we supposed to protect Wander from himself?"

Sylvia's fingers tapped inconsistent patterns into the dirt in front of her as she listened to Peepers talk. Her brow furrowed. 

"He's already given every single villain in there a reason to go after him, if anything, he's the biggest danger to himself right now."

Sylvia growled. "Yeah, that's not exactly a new development. We need to focus on getting him OUT of there, what he does while he's in there is just adding fuel to the fire."

Coincidentally enough, on the screen, Wander could be seen climbing down from the tree- still leaving the weapons in the top branches- and he appeared to be looking for firewood. Hater glared at the screen. He was making it all too easy to find him! It's almost as if he WANTED people to go after him... Hater frowned. Honestly, that notion wasn't too far-fetched. It sounded exactly like the kind of thing Wander would do to make friends.

"Ugh, why don't we just use that ship thing you were talking about earlier? We could just... you know, blast into there or something." Hater crossed his arms, trying his best to look nonchalant.

Peepers squinted at the ground and put a hand on his lower eyelid. "Theoretically, I could add weapons to the ship's design, but that wouldn't make sure we'd be able to even get close to our goal before that ship blasted us to smithereens." He looked up to the giant ship overhead, as did Sylvia and Hater. They couldn't imagine what advanced weaponry that thing could have. If provoked, this ship could prove to be much more dangerous than Dominator's ever was.  
Peepers looked back at the ground.

"We could try to build the ship, but that still leaves a huge amount of holes in our battle plan. If we don't find out a way to get past that ship's defenses, we're goners.”

Jeff, who had been stuck in a somber silence the entire conversation, finally gathered their attention.   
"Uh, hey man, not to stop your good planning progress or anything, but I think something might be going down on the big screen."

Everyone's attention was immediately brought to the screen, which had changed from 9 individual square sections to just the view of one villain at their campsite. The villain- also known as Janice the Manice- seemed to have heard or saw something, by the way her expression changed to look suspicious of her surroundings.. She was looking around, the firelight glinting off of her cherry-red eyes. She stood up, and a lava-hand shot out of the bushes so fast you could've missed it if you blinked. Janice screeched in outrage and fear as the hand enclosed her entire body, burning her skin an even deeper shade of red. She was yanked into the bushes and her scream cut off, and there was no sound left but the snaps and pops from the smoky campfire.

Everyone watched the screen in stunned silence. The campfire crackled merrily, and Dominator's face suddenly appeared directly in front of the hidden camera. Malice coated her entire expression and practically dripped from her wide grin as she stared directly into the lens and into the eyes of everyone watching the screen.

"Guess who’s going next..."

Dominator chuckled, stood up, reached behind her, and snuffed out the fire with a quick shot of ice. The screen then glitched and crackled with static, and returned to its previous state of nine separate views, this time with one darkened completely.

Sylvia's heart beat miles faster and she felt like an invisible hand was grasping at her throat and making it harder to breathe. Dominator was being vague, but Sylvia knew exactly who she was referring to.

Wander sat by his newly made fire and warmed his hands, a hopeful smile on his face. Tomorrow was another day, so he might as well enjoy the night while it lasts.

...

Snap!

Wander's eyes shot open as he heard the sudden crack of a twig underfoot, and he quickly realized that it came from the forest behind him. His body may have been asleep, but his mind was on high alert for any signs of danger. Luckily for him, his head was eerily clear, and he had the good sense to pretend to be asleep to avoid rash actions being taken by what he could only assume was his soon-to-be attacker.  
Despite his initial confusion, Wander wasn't very surprised. After all, people coming after him happened to be a major part of his plan.

The unidentified villain was obviously trying to be as quiet as possible, as they were most likely hoping to catch him off-guard while he was sleeping. If Wander was being perfectly honest, they could still surprise him with most of their actions, since he couldn't exactly see who they were, let alone what they were doing. At least he could still dodge, if need be.  
There was complete silence for a couple moments, and nothing moved but the birds in the trees. Then, the villain attacked.  
Wander heard a light swoosh and rolled out of the way of a hastily crafted spear's fall just in time to avoid getting his arm impaled to the ground. The villain audibly cursed as Wander quickly got up and ran over to the nearest tree, which happened to be one directly across from the tree he had hidden the bundle of weapons in. He climbed up the tree messily but quickly, and looked down to the villain as soon as he felt safe enough to stop.

The glaring villain below him was one he had never seen before. He was tall and lean, with two extra arms, and was covered entirely in flattened acid-green spines. His eyes were small and beady, and his expression was blank. He wore the standard GG jumpsuit and a beige backpack, with a small bag tied with rope around his waist. He held a few more deadly-sharp spears in his callused hands, and upon closer inspection, their tips seemed to glisten colorfully in the artificial morning sun.  
"Well then, I guess this won't be as easy I thought it'd be. You're a slippery one, aren't you?" His voice was somewhat average, in shocking contrast to his inordinate appearance.

Wander smiled down at the man a bit sheepishly. "I'm real sorry, but I can't tell you where I hid the weapons, it'd just be unfair! I'm sure you can understand..."

The man took one of his spears and twirled it around with his topmost left arm. "Unfair is pretty much the point, I believe," he bit out, trying and failing to maintain composure. "These games aren't exactly in everyone's favor, at least, not anymore." He glared up at Wander viciously, and if looks could kill, his stare would be pure acid.

Wander clung tighter to the branch supporting his weight. He managed to avoid losing the smile plastered on his face. "I'd like to say I'm sorry, but I do believe those weapons would've been used to hurt people! I'm afraid I couldn't allow that..." He bit his lip briefly, then smiled even wider. "I find introducing yourself really helps to gain equal standing... even if one of us isn’t exactly on the ground. Folks in my galaxy call me Wander! And you are?"

The villain's eyes narrowed further, and he maintained eye contact even as he walked over to retrieve his fourth spear from where it was stuck in the ground. "They call me Professor Plague. Fitting, if I do say so myself. My very presence causes others to feel sick."

Wander's brow furrowed in concern. "Aw, I'm so sorry to hear that! But I bet you can keep fantastic company if you just open your heart!"

The Professor rolled his eyes. "Not likely. They become sick because I make them sick, it's my thing. You'd be surprised how easy it is to take over a planet when all of its occupants are stuck in bed with a nasty flu virus.”

Wander's eyes widened. "Oh..."

"Oh indeed."  
Professor Plague sat down and carefully set down his spears- tips turned away from him- and took his fourth spear, cleaning off the dirt using a rag from his backpack. He then placed the rag beside him, and searched through the bag tied around his waist. He carefully selected a few colorful berries and squished them all together, then rubbed the berries' juices over the tip of the spear, saturating it with bright colors. He briefly turned his gaze back to Wander, who was watching him curiously. Feeling as though he had the upper hand, he decided to explain to Wander what he was doing.

"I have extensive knowledge on poisonous berries and their exact functions and effects on the living, and if combined like so, these berries can be powerful enough to paralyze an unfortunate soul for a number of hours, quite possibly even an entire day. They can be quite nasty when consumed, but just some of the concoction entering the bloodstream should do the trick."  
He took the rag and shook it of dirt, then used it to wipe all of the berry juice off of his hands.

Wander stared at the spears, suddenly even more wary of them than he had been originally. "Wow, that's... really fascinating, Mister Plague. But don't you think that's a little..."

"Dangerous?"

"I was going to say 'ill-advised,'" Wander chuckled a little, then cut off with a cough at Plague's judging expression.  
He was beginning to realize that taking away all the weapons might have just been the tip of the iceberg. Where there's a will, there's a way, after all...  
"What do you plan to do with those spears, if you don't mind explaining a bit more?"

Professor Plague looked down at his weapons without emotion. Quick as a flash, he picked all four of them up and heartily threw them directly at Wander's spot in the tree. Wander scrambled back and ended up with his back to the trunk, all four spears planted in the wood at his sides with four consecutive thunks, barely missing his arms and legs.

The Professor did not look at all surprised. "Well, would you look at that," he said, slowly and somewhat mockingly. "I missed."

Wander swallowed a lump in his throat, his heart pumping adrenaline throughout his body. As far as mornings go, this one was not turning out to be very good.

The Professor smiled at him, grabbed a nearby chunk of firewood and a loose spine from his head, and began carving another spear.

“Now, about those weapons…”


	5. Darts is a Really Stressful Game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS TOOK FOREVER TO WRITE FGGHGFHHGHGFGHGHF

The silence was… less than relaxing. Wander thought that to be… unfortunate. Sometimes, silence could be calm and clear, like a undisturbed pond. This silence, however, sent ripples of tension around the forest. It was denser than the foliage, and so thick you could cut it with a knife… but all the knives were tied up in a tree, and Wander was willing to go to severe lengths to avoid letting his not-so-friendly companion know that. 

Professor Plague ran a spine along the length of a steadily sharpening spear. He addressed Wander with his eyes still on the dangerous weapon.

"Those weapons... they would have infinite potential in my hands, wouldn't you agree?"  
The looked up at Wander, twirling the spear in his hand.

Wander looked more sad than he did scared, which made the villain's expression grow colder.

"It's not about how much potential they have, Professor, it's about what they could do in the wrong hands. Someone could get seriously hurt!"

Plague rolled his eyes. "yes, that's the point. Quite literally, I might add."

Wander's eyes softened a little, despite the situation. That was a pretty good one. He knew very well the extra potential Professor Plague could give to the weapons, he had told him previously, after all. With his special brand of poison added to the mix, he could be unstoppable with all that weaponry in his reach. Wander couldn't let that happen, he had told himself that he wouldn't let anyone get hurt.

Granted... he had already failed at his goal once. He grimaced, eyes shining a bit brighter. He wasn't going to let that happen again.

Plague was beginning to look impatient, his temper catching up to him. He stood up, stopping his hand from twirling the spear, and instead holding it in his fist.

"Your stubbornness might end up costing you your life, you know..."

"Aww, I don't think you could kill me-"

"We'll see about that."  
Plague's grip tightened around his spear. He seemed ready to throw it at any moment. "Now, I'm going to have to set some conditions, if I'm ever going to actually get something from this little debacle of a conversation."

Wander just stared at him, silently prompting him to continue. He didn't really like where this was going.

"I want to know where those weapons are… and for every time you don't tell me," He took some berries from his bag, using them to color the tip of his spear. "I add a brand new berry to this little concoction here, for when I send this happy gift up into that tree."

Wander pondered to himself over the fact that Plague was very good at making dangerous threats sound sickly sweet to the ear. The villain asked him if he understood, and the nomad felt like he was stuck between a rock and an impossible place. If he wasn't able to dodge that spear, he would undoubtedly not have a very pleasant afternoon, but if he told him where the weapons were...  
There was no way he could ever do that...  
Wander nodded.

"Good. Now, tell me where the weapons are."

This conversation was going to be less than fruitful, pun unintended and less than appreciated in the given situation.

"I... I can't tell you that, I'm sorry," Wander said, not actually feeling very sorry at all. "I'm not letting anyone get hurt... again."

Professor Plague tutted to himself, grabbed a red berry from his bag, and lightly squeezed it between his fingers, letting a bead of brilliantly red juice form on its surface.

"Now, this little berry, I admit... I don't use too often. It's too soft, you know? It's effects... subpar, but, I think it's a wonderful starting point, don't you?"

Wander swallowed and looked down at the berry, somewhat dreadfully curious. "What does it do?"

The Professor smiled warmly, as though he wasn't about to try and use small tasty orbs of doom to persuade a friendly orange mozzarella stick into giving him lots of weapons.  
"This little berry is special. It's like a paralyzing berry, but... instead of rendering you incapable of moving, it just makes every movement very, very painful."

There was silence.

Someone in the distance, down on the Secret Planet, one Zbornak in particular was screaming profanities at a large screen.   
But that's not where we are right now.

"So, I'm going to ask this again. Where are they?"

Wander just looked at him sadly, and smiled just a little.

Without a change of expression, the Professor crushed the berry in his fist and over the tip of the spear he'd made, dying it a sickly cherry-red.  
"Bad choice."

Suddenly, his arm was pulling back, and with a green blur the spear was flying directly towards Wander's face. He yelped fearfully and quickly dodged out of the way, leaving the spear to plant into the trunk of the tree, bouncing slightly up and down, inches from his head.  
He heard hysterical laughing from under him.

Plague wiped a tear from his eye, his breathing still stuttering as the last of his chuckles left him. "Wow, your face was incredible just then, I wish I had a picture!" He yelled to the sky as if talking to something neither of them could see. "Did you guys get that?! You should show it to me after all this is over!"  
He chuckled a bit more, then reached over his shoulder and ripped some spines from his back. Wander winced. 

"That, was a friendly little warning," he took a spine and rubbed the rest of the red juice onto its tip, then delicately placed it beside him.

“You know, I think I'd prefer that when- if I throw these, I do it all at once. That way we don't know which of them will strike! There's more of an element of surprise that way, it's fun, sort of like a game-show, exception being that the contestant never wins."

Wander was wondering what exactly this guy even needed the weapons for, if he managed to be this terrifying without them. That made him grimace as he began thinking about how much more dangerous that could mean the other villains were. Wander was slightly proud about how little his voice shook as he said his next words.  
"Professor, um, you know, there's no need for all this!" He ducked under the spear and leaned forward on his tree branch. "We can just talk for a little while, and I'm sure we can figure out something that doesn't involve any pain for anyone." He chuckled lightly.

Plague looked unimpressed. "Yadda yadda, you talk far too much, you know." He looked down into his berry pouch and rummaged around in it, pulling out a big, bumpy purple berry after a second. "Maybe I could do something about that."

Hmm, that soundly distinctly bad, if Wander did say so to himself, in his own head. "Oh," he said, out loud.

"Yes, oh. This little berry constricts the vocal cords. It only lasts maybe 6 or 7 hours but, ah, it does well enough. Speaking of talking, you have anything to say about those weapons yet?"

Wander frowned. 

"That's what I thought." He stabbed the berry with a quill, and tore it out. Light glinted purple on its surface, dangerously beautiful. 

Wander's breathing hitched in his throat before resuming its regular pace. He had a feeling that however this turned out, he was going to have a really terrible day.

"You know, this is pretty fun!" Plague turned the quills in his hand, marveling at their bright colors. "When I get out of here, I think I should use this method more often, don't you think?"

"No, not really..."

"Yeah, that makes sense."  
He dipped his hand into the pouch and pulled out an entire array of colorful berries.  
"Now, let's see...." He muttered under his breath, trying to remember something. "Blue and lumpy makes you grumpy... Spiky and red will kill you dead... soft and yellow makes you mellow- aha!"  
He picked out a big green berry. "This one is my personal favorite."

Wander was trying to stay focused and not try and figure out what the rhyme for the green berry would've been. "Oh, that's nice! I... guess."

"This berry makes everything you eat taste like pork!"

Wander stared at the villain owlishly, and blinked twice. "... Wow, uh... wow."

"I know, right?"  
He gently squeezed the berry and looked up at Wander devilishly. Wander sadly shook his head, and Professor Plague's sure expression turned into a deadpan stare in a second. He took a quill and stabbed the green berry violently, making Wander flinch.  
"You know, I'd be much more irritated if I didn't know how fun this is all going to be. For me. For you it's going to be horrible."

Wander sighed. Yeah, it was.

It went on like that for three more little fruits. Professor Plague would ask, Wander wouldn't tell, and another thin quill would be added to the little rainbow pile. An orange one that made every step hurt horribly, a white one that just gives people a bad fever, and a little bright pink berry that makes your hair fall out.   
Out of all of the berries, it was the pink one that managed to be the most intimidating.

After the pink-tinted quill was placed down, Plague looked up with a bored look in his little black eyes.   
"You know, I tried so hard to make this decision easy for you, but you choose to stay silent. Honestly, it's annoying. You're annoying, you know?" He carefully grabbed all the quills in one hand, then stood up. Then, he stopped, and appeared to think about something.  
"Hmm... it occurs to me that if a certain combination is reached with some of these berries, they can react like a slow-acting poison, and could actually kill you..."  
He paused, then chuckled darkly. "Too bad for you that I'm not going to say which ones!"  
He took the pink quill in one hand, watching Wander eye it nervously.  
"Before our big game-show finale, let's play a game of darts! I could always make more darts, after all, with all the berries in this forest! You like games, right? You seem like that kind of person."

Wander sat up, lifting himself slightly with his hands in preparation to dodge. Unfortunately, he'd picked an unfortunate place to have stopped climbing. The branches on all sides of him were too far away for him to reach quickly, and so moving onto any of them would require him to pause and give Professor Plague more time to fix his aim. In his previous rush to get out of range, he'd effectively backed himself into a corner.

Plague reared back his hand and threw the quill. It hit the tree, inches away from Wander's shoulder. Wander gasped out a breath. That was WAY too close for comfort. The only thing that had saved him was his ability to lower himself out of the way. Unfortunately, that meant that Plague now knew one of the only maneuvers he had in stock. 

Plague's eyes narrowed. His lip twitched up just slightly, and he took the green quill in his hand. He threw this one even faster than the first; all that could be seen was a blur, and a millisecond later, a thin quill was poking from the fur of Wander's shoulder. It was a strong spike of pain, feeling like a hot knife had pressed into his skin. He almost yelled out, but smacked a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound.

"Haha! Bullseye! You're gonna have a very bacon-y next two days… well, if I let you live that long."

Wander grimaced, not liking the sound of having a gross taste in his mouth for that much time. Also, why pork? Why?  
Not being able to stomach the idea of a large needle sticking out of his shoulder for any longer, Wander very swiftly yanked it out with his other arm, cringing from the new tidal-wave of pain that caused.  
Just as the pain was beginning to lessen, a new burst of it appeared in his leg, where another quill had sprouted.

Plague laughed. "You snooze you lose! I'd let you in on which color that one was, but I think it'll be more fun if you just find out on your own."

Wander looked at Plague with a pained expression, then swiftly removed the quill from the bleeding gash in his left leg.  
It was red, and not just from all the blood on its tip. That was the bright, saturated red of the very first berry Plague had shown to him. Remembering what that specific one did, he made a high-pitched noise in his throat and his shoulders hiked up with tension.

The professor looked at the next quill carefully. "Orange... a dazzling color, it goes great with green, don't you think?"

Wander didn't want to admit it, but Plague's edgy chit chat was beginning to make him feel some strong emotions that he did not like one bit. He shut his eyes and released a breath. The stress of the Games and this dramatic situation was really wearing on his nerves, but he didn't want to break under pressure and snap at anyone at that time, that would just be plain rude, and very unprofessional. Wander was not one to give up, and he knew for certain that even though Plague was just being downright mean, there had to be so much more to him.

"Professor..." Wander looked at Plague and gave a small smile, all while clutching at the wounds in his shoulder and leg. "even though our first introductions have gotten off to sort of a... bad start-"

"Yeah, yeah, desperate rambling and whatever, could you maybe get to the point?" Professor Plague rolled his eyes, impatiently twirling the orange quill in his fingers. "I have some Games to win, you know."

Wander gulped and looked down, his brow creasing a bit more.  
"I just want you to know that... I don't think you make… me sick. Physically, maybe... but I've seen lots of people in my life- lots of villains, too- and I think you're really something special!"

Plague's lax expression grew a bit tighter, and he squinted up at Wander.

"In the short time I've known you, you've really impressed me- not alot of people manage to get a hit on me!" He looked to the side for an awkward moment with a slightly amused expression, thinking about how Hater would probably react, had he heard that.   
"And I just think... if you tried, you could do some really incredible things! And I don't mean just taking over planets... with your abilities, I think you could really help some people! ‘Doctor Plague,’ how does that sound?"

Professor Plague was looking at the ground, face unreadable. Wander leaned down to try and get a better view of him, but was knocked back against the tree by the force of a purple quill hitting his already wounded leg. He cried out with shock and pain, and Plague laughed, almost hysterically.  
"Like I said… you really don't know when to shut up..." he looked up, eyes wide and glistening, gripping the rest of the quills tightly in his hand. "Thanks for the offer, but I think I'll pass! Let's say we try this one more time..."

Wander clutched his leg to his chest, eyes shut tight, knowing he didn't have enough time to try and reason with Plague again. All he could hope for was luck having his back, but sometimes, even a force that strong can only shift the odds in favor of someone else.

"Where are they?"

He held his breath, eyes still closed, and waited in the silence for something to happen.

There was the sound of leaves crunching, a muffled yell, and the sound of something big hitting a tree very far away. Then, the silence returned, and Wander didn't dare open his eyes, fearful of disturbing it.  
An instant later, he found that he had no choice, as something thin and whip-like wrapped around his waist and yanked him down from his branch, a shocked gasp echoing in the space behind him.   
With no more time to waste, whatever or whoever had grabbed him swiftly shoved him into a burlap sack, and started moving away from the tree at a fast pace.

Everything had happened so quickly, it took a few moments for Wander's thoughts to catch up with him. As soon as he realized his current position, he began fiercely struggling to escape the bag he'd been shoved into- upside down, he might add. After mere seconds of struggling, he began to notice an aching pain setting into his limbs at every movement, and any attempt at a call for help sent little electric shocks of pain up and down his throat. Worse yet, the inside of his mouth was beginning to taste like pork.   
It took just one more minute of struggling before every movement he made had his limbs feeling like they were on fire, and he couldn't force himself to burn any longer.

Somewhat sarcastically optimistic that he'd managed to turn himself right-side-up again, Wander collapsed limply against the rough sides of the bag. He thought to himself that perhaps burlap sacks were being brought into his life specifically to spite him.  
With that thought, Wander sighed soundlessly, and allowed himself to be carried away into the unknown.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you I suck at weekly updates


	6. In Which my Favorite Character is Brutally Murdered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I don't really have an excuse for the wait. Whoopsie

There was a wide range of emotions following the latest spectacle on the big screen of the Secret Planet (the name of which was becoming less and less relevant every second), but the consensus of the majority seemed to be pure, abject horror. The most panic in the area was radiating almost exclusively from Sylvia, who had, at some point, put her head in her hands and her tail around her body, and had been sitting still for a very long time. Nobody wanted to approach her, because they didn't know what to say. The situation was becoming dire to the point that there seemed to be no hope left.

Hater was off to the side somewhere, sulking, the only clear emotion on his face was anger. Otherwise, he seemed completely unreadable. Jeff was kneeling next to a group of watchdogs, who were looking closely at a pile of loose papers and schematics, and talking quietly among themselves, in an effort to not break the fragile bubble of concentration shielding them from the tension closing in on all sides.  
The only person who seemed to have the guts and the time necessary to approach the solemn Zbornak was Peepers, and even then, he wasn't looking forward to whatever came next for him. 

Peepers tiptoed over to Sylvia with all the ease and grace he could muster, which wasn't very impressive. He needed Sylvia to focus less on how bad the situation was, and more on what they were doing to stop it. To do that, he felt that he needed to talk her out of her current emotional state.   
He stopped next to her for a moment, and just stood there, looking around nervously and trying to come up with something that would snap her out of her fog. He cleared his throat and prepared to say something.

"He's going to be okay."

Peepers blinked a couple times in surprise. He hadn’t been expecting that. Sylvia looked up from her hands and continued speaking, albeit unusually quietly for her.

"It seems bad right now... but it's seemed bad before, and Wander always got back up after everything, no matter what." She looked up at the screen, which was now maintaining about eight different screens, one of them showing Wander, tied up and unconscious, but not alone.  
"... Wander told me that he was going to be okay, and I believe him. He's helpless right now, but I'm going to help him, and I know that luck's going to be on our side for this one."  
She looked at Peepers with a grimly set jaw and determination burning in her eyes.

"We're going to get him out of there, no matter what."

…

 

Wander woke up with the all-too familiar feeling of rope pinning his arm to his sides, and dirt under his cheek. In hindsight, he could consider that sort of disappointing, but he was too distracted by the incredibly uncomfortable sensation of aching limbs, and the distinct incapability of movement. If Wander was being perfectly honest, the rope was pretty unnecessary.  
As his mind slowly woke up, he also couldn't help but notice the faint taste of bacon in his mouth, which made him frown. Honestly, that quill's effect seemed more like a topper on the wedding cake made of disappointment that was his life right now. Ironically, bacon was turning out to be his least favorite part of the morning so far.

"Looks like someone finally woke up," a gruff, sarcastic voice grumbled from somewhere a few feet away. "Morning, sunshine, I hope you're not too dead to answer a few questions of mine."

Wander groaned shortly. He was getting really tired of questions. Could nobody just want a pleasant conversation about the weather? It was artificially made, but doesn’t that just make it more interesting?  
With considerable effort and an uncomfortable spike of pain, he managed to peel his eyes open. He came face to face with a dying fire, and the half-shadowed visage of a person he wasn't expecting to see.

"Happy to see me?" Two pairs of bright purple eyes glared down at him, the owner of which was picking at the tightly woven brambles framing her face. Callice's brow tightened in an unreadable expression. "You shouldn't be."

Wander's eyes widened, and he opened his mouth to try and greet the familiar face, but something like acid filled his throat as his vocal cords tightened, unable to make any noise other than a rough squeak. Callice glared.  
"Oh, brother. Don't tell me, you lost your voice? Well, isn't this just going great for the both of us!" She threw her hands up and tightened them into fists, then leaned back sulkily and crossed her arms over her chest.  
"Don't thank me for saving your life or anything, I didn't do it because I care if you live or die. I just want those weapons so I can win this thing and go home."

Wander's brow bunched up in sympathy, and Callice scoffed, disbelieving. There was a pause to make room for the crackling of fire, and Wander was able to notice how the bright colors of the artificial sun made for a pretty view of the forest. While he was distracted by his own thoughts, he accidentally moved his leg, and the subsequent lightning bolt of pain up his side made him flinch. Callice noticed this, and all four of her eyes narrowed.

"What's the matter with you, anyway? You seemed fine up in that tree. But I guess I didn't stick around long enough to figure out exactly what that Plague guy's game was before I buried his face in the dirt."  
At Wander's sudden alarmed expression, she lifted a hand as though she was waving off his concern. "Don't get your leaves in a bunch, I didn't kill him. I just roughed him up a bit and tied him with vines. It'll take him awhile to get out of that tree... no, I'm saving the real action for when I find those weapons you hid." She glared at him again, leaning forward slightly. "I will find them, you can't keep quiet forever; but you are going to be sticking with me until you tell me where they are. If you do, maybe I'll kill you last."

Wander tried to reply once again, but only made a sad croaking noise before settling for a shaky smile. Callice sighed gratingly and raised a hand over the ground. A moment passed, then a vine snapped off of her arm and picked Wander up, placing him in a sitting position against a log behind him. Wander stiffened as he was picked up, trying to avoid moving any of his limbs unless absolutely necessary. The vines disappeared and Callice poked at the fire with a stick.  
"Your pathetic face was annoying me. How did you even get in these games if you're just some soft, gooey weirdo?"

Wander looked up, giving her a gentle smile and a look that implied it was a long story. Callice let out a breath, and poked at the fire more aggressively.  
"I almost wish you could talk, just so you could explain yourself. What, do you take over planets just by asking nicely or something? What's your gimmick?"

Wander frowned at her. She snorted, "Okay, that's not it, then. I guess you can't really explain when you’re like this. Sucks to be you, then. So anyway, are you like a meercat or something…? What’s up with the no-clothes thing?"

About an hour passed filled with inquiries all along those lines. The tightening in Wander's chest lessened a bit over time, and he found himself able to stutter out a few words in reply to Callice's repeated questioning. Every now and then, she would ask about the weapons. Wander would just smile in reply, and Callice would fall into a stormy silence for about ten minutes before bringing up something else.

The sun was higher in the sky and the shadows were in full retreat at around the time when Wander heard something in the distance. He stopped listening to Callice briefly and turned his full attention behind her, where he swore he noticed some sort of alien noise, almost like the air was vibrating.

"So, anyway, I'm in the middle of the lake, right? And there's three guys in a raft catching up to me, and I'm swimming as fast as I can... hey, what are you looking at? You shouldn't take my stories for granted, you know, you're probably never going to hear one again."

Wander painfully lifted an arm to point a shaking finger behind Callice.  
"J-just, heard- heard something, behind..."

Callice’s easy expression shifted in intensity. She turned around and shot a hand out to the lightly flickering fire behind her, smothering it once and for all in in vines. A couple vines reached over and covered Wander's mouth to stifle any other words.  
She looked carefully into the dense foliage for any sign of movement. 

After a few tense moments of near complete silence, a buzzing noise filled the air, and a single bee flew out in front of her and landed on one of the leaves swirling around her arm. Callice blinked at it.  
"A bee? Why would they simulate bees in this environment? They're completely useless!"  
She flicked the bee off of her arm and it twirled onto the ground, buzzing sadly. Wander made a distressed whine behind her, and Callice rolled a pair of her eyes.

Then, she realized that the buzzing had never stopped. In fact, it seemed to be getting much louder.  
.  
"Uh oh..."  
Callice spun and leapt over the fire's remains to grab Wander, vines wrapped around him and allowed her to sling him over her shoulders like a fuzzy orange backpack. Then, she began running away from the angry swarm of about 999 bees coming to avenge their fallen friend at all costs.

Callice swerved around and ducked under branches, rocks, and bushes, all while yelling angrily, "I HATE BUGS!"  
Wander was focused entirely on the incredibly uncomfortable situation he had found himself in, trying to move as little as possible while he watched a swarm of bees grow closer and closer to him at every second. He tried to talk to the bugs and calm them down, but he found himself incapable of catching his breath in his condition. He just cast a half-panicked half-apologetic look at the swarm and tried not to be threatening, which really wasn't difficult at all, especially right then.

The bees were beginning to converge on them, and the noise was deafening. Bees were landing in Wander's fur and they seemed to be trying to pull him backwards and away from Callice, which was likely another attempt at kidnapping him. Wander was getting really tired of getting kidnapped, really fast. Thankfully, Callice swept around at the right moment and ducked down under the swarm of bees, which collectively disoriented them enough to give her time to swing up into a tree using her vines. A few straggler bees left in Wander's fur flew up to Callice and tried to sting her face, but she puffed out the brambles on her head and it hit them away, which caused them to spiral down and away like tiny fighter jets. Several small cannons went off to commemorate their sacrifice.  
The bees were about to fly up to the pair of tree-climbers, and Callice was ready to swing onto another branch, but both of their efforts were rudely interrupted by a large blast of lava colliding directly into the swarm, and killing all of the bees on contact. About 900 individual cannon shots went off at the same time, and everyone in the arena in possession of ears was incredibly uncomfortable for a couple of moments.

Callice and Wander were completely silent, watching the now cooling lava (full of bee carcasses) that was splattered across the forest floor, causing the grass to catch fire a little before settling into a large, dark circle around the new rock formation. Callice looked around in fear of Dominator, but nobody could be seen. It seemed as though that would be it, until several spikes of ice pierced the tree around Callice, and suddenly they were being chased again by someone they couldn't even see.  
Callice yelled in panic as she swung vine to vine like Tarzan if he was scared for his life, narrowly avoiding spikes of ice sent from the tree like the unlucky targets of frosty the sniper rifle.

Callice growled loudly. “ WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?! YOU DON'T EVEN NEED THE WEAPONS! YOU HAVE SWEET FIRE AND ICE POWERS! THESE GAMES ARE SUPPOSED TO BE FAIR!"

Suddenly, the ice bolts stopped. Dominator's high-pitched laughter rang throughout the forest.

"Oh, this isn't about weapons! I could wipe all you losers off the face of the planet with my eyes closed and both hands tied behind my back! This is about revenge, and the little furry freak is all mine."

Callice looked incredulously at Wander. "What even are you?! What did you manage to do to her that was so bad?"

Wander smiled sheepishly. "H... Helped...?"

Callice stared at him and then shook her head vigorously. Asking, apparently, was hopeless.  
She twisted around as another icicle sprouted right next to her midsection. She yelped and looked ahead, trying to pinpoint exactly where Dominator was.  
There was a loud THUNK as an icicle flew directly into Callice's shoulder, and she screamed out in pain.

"The icicle is the perfect murder weapon, y’know? It doesn't leave any traces behind. But I don't think anyone really cares about that! Not that I did before, anyway.”  
Another icicle shot out and hit the vines attaching Wander to Callice, and they unraveled, letting the fuzzy traveler fall down to the forest floor below.

Wander landed face-up, and all he saw was a sudden burst of red heading towards Callice's branch, before a scream sounded in the air, and the branch came loose, plummeting downwards, directly onto the nomad's head. The last thing he heard was a laugh, getting farther and farther away, until he was surrounded by darkness once again.

**Author's Note:**

> I've already written out the first four chapters of this fic, and I'm hoping to be able to post at least once a week. However, my updating schedules have sucked majorly in the past and I'm not going to get ahead of myself so soon.  
> Though I feel obligated to mention that I've never abandoned a fic after it got public and even if it takes me forever to finish this fic it WILL get finished, even if only like one person is reading it. Please tell me if you see something that you think got messed up in the uploading process. See you in the next chapter!


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